7 Helpful Reasons Why Your Confidence Level is Low When Approaching Amazing Men

I’ve been talking to a lot of single gay men around the world about dating and what dating means to them and I notice one common element when it comes to their derailed love lives. Here’s what they’re saying: “I hate dating or I just want to bypass all that dating stuff and get to the gold or… For me personally, I hate to date. I hate having to tell someone it’s not a match. I always make the wrong choices.”

It’s quite real that dating can be a scary experience. After all, you’re putting yourself out there; you’re being vulnerable and setting yourself up for possible rejection – so, why are you taking the fast track approach to being in a relationship?  Well, my gut instinct is telling me all of this can be avoided if one simply gets smart about dating.
The bottom line:  If you take your time, do the groundwork and be aware of that part of you that wants to have everything right NOW, you are likely to avoid the heartache.

What are you willing to do to ensure that your love life takes the front seat? Are you finally ready to acknowledge that part of you, deep down inside, that desires a loving, meaningful relationship? After all, you do have so much to offer, right? To get you started, I’ve compiled a list of 7 Reasons why you need to be paying attention to so that you can turn your love life around.

Helpful Reason #1: You don’t do the groundwork. After just a few dates, you’ve already made the decision that he’s the right guy for you. Hang on! This is your life we’re talking about. Dating is about being smart, gathering information, exploring each others’ world and defining what the relationship means to you.

Helpful Reason #2: You spend way too much time on the first, second and even third date. As the old saying goes, “Less is more.” Keep the meeting short and sweet. However, do be observant and present to the occasion; tune into him and your feelings. Remember, this is the first impression he’ll get of you.

Helpful Reason #3: You approach dating with a lot of desperation. Gosh, we all want to love and be loved, but you may not have grasped the true value in being a successful single yet. You may not have taken care of the important areas of your life; emotional, financial, spiritual and supportive, so you can date with confidence and freedom.

Helpful Reason #4: You don’t know how to be yourself. In business and your career you may be at the top of your game, but for some strange reason when it comes to matters of the heart, you become paralyzed. Being social is something that might be a challenge for you. You might even believe that if you were to be the real you, you might scare him off. Is that really true and how do you know that to be true? Remember, there is something about being vulnerable with another person that makes you very attractive.

Helpful Reason #5: You can’t wait to have sex. The connection is right and the sexual attraction is on high. You think if you connect sexually, that means you are right for each other in terms of a committed relationship. Well, the fact is, sex and sexual attraction is only a small part of the relationship equation. Having sex too soon can cloud your judgment.

Helpful Reason #6: Your standards are too high. Relax on this one. Someone recently told me that he’s been single for 10 years and refuses to date due to not being able to meet someone who can meet his high standards. Those were his words exactly. It’s perfectly fine to have standards, in fact, I recommend having standards – IF they are realistic and based on your core values?

Helpful Reason #7: You forget to have fun. This one really sums it up. Have fun, keep it simple and smile.

So, it’s time to take these helpful reasons and start building that confidence that you already have to meet your Mr. Right. If you do the groundwork, build a solid foundation by knowing who you are, what you want in an ideal partner and relationship and how to get there, not only will you experience an amazing feeling of freedom around everything that happens in your life you will stand up and notice all of the amazing guys you come in contact with everyday.