Are You Following Through With Your Promises?

Guys, I’m sure by now you’ve reached the end of your limit with all of the pressure to follow through with making 2010 a better year for your life. Making your life less about pain and suffering and more about contributing and living in joy, especially when it comes to love.

The problem is, the higher the expectation, the more pressure there is to perform and following through with making 2010 your best year in love. And when you don’t follow through there’s some self-butt kicking, right?

Does that sound like you?

That is the biggest reason why you don’t follow through with the promises you make for the coming year. Hey, maybe you focus so much on the fact that you’ve tried your darnedest to find Mr. Wonderful and settle down. You’ve put yourself on the line so many times (more times than you care to count) only to get let down once again- that you’ve become, perhaps…a little jaded?

It’s ok. You can admit it. Really, it’s ok.

I used to be as jaded as they come. Oh, sure, my exterior showed a happy-go-lucky kid, but what lurked deep down inside would make you crawl under a rock and never come out. Gratefully today, I am that happy-go-lucky kid I was meant to be. The kid who was always there waiting to shine.

Well, guys, you know you can have more for yourself when it comes to falling in love? You can have your cake and eat it too when it comes to building a life with the guy of your dreams? AND I know you can’t help making those new year resolutions, because it’s a way to keep you accountable for bettering your life. Hey, it’s ok – nothing wrong with that!

What will make it easier for you to fulfill your promises?

Ok, to help you out in a big way, a loving way, I am going to share with you Three HUGE Secrets with Tips that will help you let go of expectations and REALLY make 2010 your absolute best year ever in life and LOVE.

You’ll certainly want to apply these strategies in your life right away, because I even give you examples of how to implement them, and taking such action will start to melt away the pressure to be perfect.

1. Don’t make promises you can’t keep. Start with ONE significant change that you would like to see happen in your love life and map it out in small portions.

Tip: Maybe you want to acquire a more positive attitude around dating. So, a small step might look like taking a good look at how you view dating and relationships and write about it OR that might mean taking my Single Gay Guy’s Dating Integrity Bootcamp where you’ll get personal attention and support with changing your attitude towards love and relationships.

Maybe you want to take a different approach to how you are meeting men. Get better at starting and engaging in conversations with men. If your excuse is, “your too shy”, you are doing yourself a disservice by not taking the action necessary to help you bust out of your cocoon by showing the world who you are.

Bonus Tip: If you are using online dating sites, it might be time to change sites, update your picture and make sure that you are conveying the real YOU in your written profile. There are many great sites out there with great integrity and a clean clear message that there is more to this dating thing. If you are serious about getting steady in love GetSteady.com is the place to do it..

2. Promise every day, not just at the end of every year. Make each day about doing the best you can to contribute greatness to your life. Doing one simple action each day brings you closer to your dreams and goals as a single gay man who is READY for love.

Tip: This might look like writing in a journal each night before you go to bed. Write down all the things you are grateful for that day. Or it might look like making changes to your financials by clearing away debt and getting support to help you do that. There is nothing more relationship attractive than being financially sound. Can’t you feel the anxiety melt away?

Bonus tip: Choose a charity organization that resonates with you and volunteer your time in any capacity. Go into it with out expectations or hoping for anything in return. By opening up your heart you will really get the the greatness factor rolling in your your life. If you can’t find a charity, maybe there is friend or someone you know of who could use a little support. Example: There is a friend of mine with three beautiful children. She’s also going to school full time. It’s not easy for a single mother to try and balance everything. Sometimes they need a break or a reprieve from their day to day. So, I offer myself as a babysitter anytime she needs me and that works with my schedule. This makes a HUGE difference in her life.

3. Ease up on the punches. We all beat up on ourselves once in a while. BUT, haven’t you knocked yourself around just a little too much? Are you emotionally blaming yourself for all the mistakes you’ve made in love? SO, put the gloves away and start softening the blows by introducing the idea that they weren’t mistakes, but valuable lessons.

Tip: Maybe there is a past relationship that still needs healing. If it’s in your power, and most times it is, take steps to make amends. First,  start by forgiving yourself. You did the best you could with the tools you had. Then, write him a letter. It doesn’t mean that you have to mail the letter- this will start the process of opening up and letting go.

Go ahead and make 2010 the year you met your match and fell in love. Also, make it the year when you ease up on the pressure to be a perfect single.